This is my Official PUMP IT UP Lost season recap<\/b>!!!!!!!!<\/p>\n
Let’s go on a trip down memory lane….and look at some pretty pictures. Captions are as stupid as I could possibly make them.<\/p>\n
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\nAh, the first episode. Remember when we had to wait 4 months to find out what the eff Jack and Locke were looking at? They were all, “Let’s just prance down into this dark and creepy hole!”<\/p>\n
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And then Desmond was all like, “I don’t think so brothah. You gotta push this button thingy. The end. THE END.”<\/p>\n
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And then Jin was all like, “UDDDEEERRRSSS!!!!!!!” (cause he can only speak Jin-glish!)<\/p>\n
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And then Jack was all emo and crying and little did we know, we’d have to deal with lots of crying this season…<\/p>\n
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And then we saw that preview where Jin was speaking English! And we all freaked! And once we found out it was only a dream, we were all like, “Hey Lindeloff! CLUCK YOU, buddy.”<\/p>\n
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And then we were all thinking, “Hey, Shannon hasn’t been as horrible to watch lately! I won’t mind watching her now.” And then Ana-Bitch came and busted a cap in her ass! And we were all like “ZOMGWTFBBQ!!!11!!1!”<\/p>\n
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And then we saw this gigantic scary cavemannish guy, and we were like, WTF he must be the Others! But he wasn’t<\/i> the others! He was the sweet and gentle Mr. Eko. <\/p>\n
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And then Sawyer was all sick and stuff, and Kate was all “You my everything, baby,” and he was like, “You have healed me, gentle woman.”<\/p>\n
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And then Hurley was totally stoked that Jin and Sun were makin babies in their tarp tent, and he was all, “Dude.”<\/p>\n
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And then we saw the Orientation video with Dr. Marvin Candle…if that’s his REAL NAME! And we were all like “Oh Shit!”<\/p>\n
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And then Michael talked to Walt on that computer RIGHT AFTER DR WHATSHISNAME SAID NOT TO and we were all like “OMFG” and fell off our couches!<\/p>\n
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And then Mr Eko was all, “Let’s go find my dead bruddah in deh jungle,” and then he saw the black cloud of doom!<\/p>\n
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Then we saw that dude from that boat that stole Walt! And he had torches! And Kate! And Alex!<\/p>\n
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And then Charlie started tripping the eff out and he was all, “wtf is that Jesus H. Christ, H standing for Hurley of course?”<\/p>\n
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And then the flippy thingers started flipping and we thought the island was going to explode!<\/p>\n
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And then Kate was all, WTF why is there a beard hanging out in a locker? Is this Sayid’s?<\/p>\n
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And Locke’s legs got stuck under the blast doors and WHAT THE HELL a map magically appeared! And Henry was running amuck in the hatch!<\/p>\n
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And then we were all like OH SHIT he’s not really Henry Gale! And Sayid was all like, “Henry Gale, you are officially pwned.”<\/p>\n
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And then Sawyer was all, “How can I still be sexy and also be wearing your 80 year old Jewish grandma’s glasses, I ask you.”<\/p>\n
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And then Ana-Lucia was all like, “Michael you piece of balls you SHOT ME and I don’t deserve this!” And millions of people around America were dancing around singing Ding Dong the Witch is Dead!<\/p>\n
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And Libby was all like, “Wait a goddamn minute, you’re killing me off too!? But…but….I was in that hospital….with Hurley….but….” *dies*<\/p>\n
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And then Eko’s brothah was all like, “I’m going to haunt you in your dreams like Freddie. Only I will be extra nice and priestish.”<\/p>\n
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And then Miss Cleo was all like, “I have creepy ass eyeballs, don’t make me use them for evil. BTW, we have that kid of yours.”<\/p>\n
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And Michael was all like, “It’s because I’m black, isn’t it? …Oh….Wait….WAAAAALT! I want mah boy!”<\/p>\n
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And then this dude was all like, “Oh my gawd, don’t point that nasty thing at me, you beast.”<\/p>\n
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And then the preview for the finale came on! And Locke was all, “Am I gonna have to choke a bitch?”<\/p>\n
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And then Charlie was like, “ZOMG! Could I be any cuter?”<\/p>\n
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And then Jack was all, “IS THIS WHAT WE’RE GOING TO HAVE TO WONDER ABOUT UNTIL OCTOBER?”<\/p>\n
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Added 4\/12\/08: This recap is close to my heart, as it is the very first one I wrote, on a whim, when I was insanely bored one day at work. I had no idea what this ridiculous thing would spawn. This is my Official PUMP IT UP Lost season recap!!!!!!!! Let’s go on a trip […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,24,6],"tags":[311,25,28,9],"class_list":["post-66","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-lost","category-recap-tv","category-tv","tag-lost","tag-lost-recap","tag-lost-season-2","tag-recap"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.theackattack.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/66","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.theackattack.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.theackattack.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.theackattack.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.theackattack.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=66"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.theackattack.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/66\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.theackattack.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=66"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.theackattack.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=66"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.theackattack.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=66"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}